7 stories I heard while in New Ulm

Tags

, ,

A monument from the New Ulm City Cemetery. If you want to practice your German translation skills, go to New Ulm.

A monument from the New Ulm City Cemetery. If you want to practice your German translation skills, go to New Ulm.

My book tour took me to New Ulm on May 16. I had two events: one at Orchard Hill assisted living community, and one at the public library.

The group at Orchard Hill posed great questions and comments. As older people, they had some good stories about the days in which death was more ever-present (see my recent essay for the University of Minnesota Press blog on this very topic). It also seemed that almost everyone had some past connection to gravedigging. I heard a variation of “my ____ was a gravedigger” several times—it was usually a father or an uncle. This makes sense. In the past, in small, rural communities, you might have several people who pitched in to dig graves. It generally was not any one person who made it a career, like my dad did. Communities tended to form around the church, so it was usually a fellow parishioner who did the job—whoever had the time and physical ability.

Some conversational snippets from Thursday included:

  • The guy who worked at a gravedigger in the Alexandria area. He remembered a guy who died over the winter. The family did not want to bury the body in the winter, so they stored him in the grain bin.
  • Two little girls who died who were buried next to the house.
  • Playing on a little hill on a farm, only decades later to find out it was an Indian burial mound.
  • Lighting a fire in a steel tub to defrost a grave that needed to be dug in the winter. The fire might have to be tended a day or two before all the frost would be thawed.
  • A little boy who died in the 1930s. The mortician came to the house to prepare the body. A professional photographer took a picture of the boy, probably the only photograph ever taken of him. The body was waked at home, and someone stayed near him all night. Some solution (perhaps vinegar) was applied to the face to prevent it from becoming gray and ashen.
  • We were talking about the common images etched in granite these days, such as portraits, farms, and tractors. One woman piped up, “and concertinas.” We were in New Ulm, after all, practically the polka capital of the U.S.  :)

This makes me think I should go to these communities more often and record the memories people have of deaths and cemeteries.

I enjoyed the story a woman told of picking out a gravestone for her husband. She needed a flat stone, and was shown sample after sample. Nothing piqued her interest. She asked the salesman if he had any more, and he took her in the back where he had some flawed pieces. There, she found exactly what she was looking for: a piece of flawed marble embedded with black streaks. She’s an artist, as was her husband. “Every piece of art has a flaw,” she said. “You just have to know where to look.”

“Six Feet Under” resonates

Tags

, , , ,

I wrote a short essay for the University of Minnesota Press blog on “Six Feet Under” and our culture of death. Here’s a short excerpt:

“In We’ll Be the Last Ones to Let You Down, I try to capture the Midwestern stoicism I have witnessed at funerals and wakes. I saw little raw emotion. So few Nates, so many, many Davids.”

If you were a fan of the show, you know what I mean.

You can find the blog post here.

Resurrection Mary: A creepy cemetery story

Tags

, , , , ,

IMG_0839

The window at The Book Cellar, Chicago. Barrie’s book also has an awesome cover.

I recently spent 36 hours in Chicago, in and out for an event May 9 at The Book Cellar. I read with Barrie Jean Borich, author of the recent Body Geographic and my former mentor in the Loft Mentorship series.

Barrie and me at The Book Cellar, Chicago.

Barrie and me at The Book Cellar, Chicago.

Barrie mentioned that there seem to be a lot of cemetery enthusiasts in Chicago who might like my book. When she said that, I was reminded of a story I hadn’t thought about for years: the story of Resurrection Mary. They say (I love the “they” in “they say”!) that through the years, a young woman has been spotted at different times walking along Archer Avenue in Justice, just outside of Chicago. She’s dressed as if ready to go to a party. She’s been picked up by drivers several times (or so “they” say) and she always asks to be let out in front of Resurrection Cemetery.

I had totally forgotten about this story. It was one that mesmerized me as a child (if you’ve read my book, then you know of my childhood fascination with the supernatural–Resurrection Mary was part of this, though I don’t mention her by name in my book). It made me wish I had planned more free time on this trip. The next time I’m in Chicago, I definitely am going to Resurrection Cemetery.

Here’s the “Unsolved Mysteries” segment on Resurrection Mary.

I frankly do not have any creepy cemetery stories of my own. Do you? If so, please share!

An ethical dilemma in the Boston bombings aftermath

Tags

, , , ,

Photo Credit: Leo Reynolds via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: Leo Reynolds via Compfight cc

A story about the funeral home that accepted Tamerlan Tsarnaev’s body appeared on the front page of the New York Times‘ website today. Peter Stefan, the funeral director at Graham Putnam & Mahoney Funeral Parlors in Worcester, Mass., has received criticism for accepting the body.

But what was he supposed to do? Requests were sent to funeral home after funeral home. Stefan was the one who finally accepted after it was clear that Russian officials didn’t want the body, either.

Something has to be done with  bodies after people die, no matter how reviled they are. Who took Timothy McVeigh’s body? Who took Ted Bundy’s body? Who takes the body of the man who killed himself, his wife and his kids in a murder-suicide? Stefan says this in the story: “I’ve had murderers here, people that murder their kids, people that murder their parents. A lot of hullabaloo that we’ve had here.”

I found some information on Timothy McVeigh. After his execution on June 10, 2001, he was cremated at Mattox Ryan Funeral Home in Terre Haute, Ind. Information about his remains or a memorial service remained secret. Apparently McVeigh had wanted to donate his organs, but prison regulations did not allow that.

Now the problem comes in finding a cemetery that will take Tsarnaev’s body. So far, no takers. The family has requested burial; cremation isn’t an option. It probably would be best to bury him in an unmarked grave. Otherwise, I can imagine it would become an attraction for haters and possibly also extremists who might see Tsarnaev as a martyr.

At the end of the story, Stefan says this: “I’m not burying a terrorist, I’m burying a dead body. We’re trying to exercise some character here.”

It’s a tough position, for sure. What do you think?

 

Top views from St. Mary’s Cemetery, Winona, Minn.

Tags

,

On April 29, I had the perfect excuse to visit the lovely Mississippi River town of Winona, Minn. I came into town for a “dinner with the author” event at The Book Shelf (I was the author!).

I like where they placed my book at The Book Shelf! (All photos by author).

I like where they placed my book at The Book Shelf! So this is technically not a view from St. Mary’s Cemetery, sorry! (All photos by author).

I had some extra time in the late afternoon, so I thought I’d visit a Winona cemetery. I decided to go to St. Mary’s first, even though Woodlawn is not far away. I guess I was drawn to the fact that St. Mary’s is a Catholic cemetery, and I wanted to see how this St. Mary’s would compare to the St. Mary’s I knew in Waseca County.

A pretty day to visit a cemetery. St. Mary's in Winona is kind of tucked into a hillside.

A pretty day to visit a cemetery. St. Mary’s in Winona is kind of tucked into a hillside.

Winona is a Mississippi River town, a couple of hours south of Minneapolis/St. Paul. I think I may have been to Winona only one other time in my life, about 20 years ago. It’s only two hours from where I live, so I wonder why I don’t go there more often. I have an affinity for river and lake towns. I grew up in a lake town. I now live in a lake town but spend a lot of time in Mankato, a Minnesota River town.

St. Mary’s in Winona is quite hilly, which seems challenging to mow. Also, it’s on a bluff so I’m sure the digging is rather rocky.

IMG_0811

Mother Theresa, really?

IMG_0814

Check out the inscription under Harriet! This made me laugh. My dad wasn’t the only one who could find a little levity in cemeteries.

I like the inscription for Harriet in the above photo, but I also wonder about H.E. Larry as a person. This is a great example of stories that can be inferred from cemeteries. Why “Good night, sweet prince?” Was Larry a Shakespeare fan? What does “H.E.” stand for? Why did he go by Larry?

The graves of bishops.

The graves of bishops.

Winona is home to the diocese of Winona. A number of bishops, priests, and monsignors are buried at St. Mary’s. Have you ever noticed that priests and bishops have some of the largest monuments in a cemetery? Spare no expense, right? I did see a familiar name, Bishop Loras Watters. He was bishop of the Winona Diocese when I was a kid–St. Joseph’s in Waldorf, my church, was part of the Winona Diocese.

IMG_0815

A iron cross.

I didn’t see any iron crosses in Waseca area cemeteries when I was growing up. From what I understand, iron crosses are mostly a Czech thing. I don’t live too far from Montgomery, Minn., a major Czech settlement, but I haven’t been to a cemetery there to see if there are iron crosses. St. Mary’s in Winona had plenty–you can see a couple more in the background of the picture above. But the best I could tell, these were Polish graves. I suppose iron crosses did not adhere to strict borders, and maybe they are a broader Eastern European thing. If you know more, please comment!

I was really struck by the number of Polish names in this cemetery. I’m so used to Catholic cemeteries being primarily Irish around Waseca. I learned more about Winona, that clearly it was a Polish settlement in the early days.

I never made it to Woodlawn, the other big cemetery in Winona, so enamoured was I was St. Mary’s. I saw a few people walking around St. Mary’s, which always makes me happy. The landscape guys were also there, a sure sign of spring! Memorial Day is just over four weeks away, so the rush is on to get cemeteries in shape by that big day.

In Defense of the Ordinary

Reblogged from BREVITY's Nonfiction Blog:

Click to visit the original post

A guest post from the essayist Joe Bonomo:

I write in defense of the ordinary life. Two common impulses in writing autobiographically—what happened to me is important; what happened matters because it happened to me—are problematic, since very few of us experience dramatic, statistically rare events during our lives, and yet all of us experience, well, something. When I begin an essay, or find my way into a subject autobiographically, the qualities of my experience or character don’t really matter in and of themselves.

Read more… 949 more words

This is one of the best explanations I've read on why write autobiographical essays. The "ordinary" in the title caught my eye--I'm a big champion of "ordinary" lives (which we all know never are).

A great example of a cemetery story

Tags

, , ,

My favorite thing about going into a cemetery is walking among the gravestones and deducing the stories of people buried there. If you’ve read WE’LL BE THE LAST ONES TO LET YOU DOWN, you know that I’ve been doing this my whole life.

Some gravestones are simple: you have only a date of birth and a date of death to go on. But still, if you know something about history, you can make some educated assumptions. Maybe the person was born during the Civil War, and is buried next to his father, a Civil War veteran. Did the mother have to give birth alone, while her husband was away at war? Maybe the date of death was 1918, or 1933, or some other year of a known pandemic, such as the Spanish influenza or whooping cough.

When I went to Boston in early March for the Association of Writers and Writing Programs conference, my first stop (after the hotel) was the famous Mt. Auburn Cemetery across the river in Cambridge. I wrote an earlier post about the visit in general. I plan a series of additional posts that highlight some of the cemetery stories that intrigued me. I’ll start with the Fuller family.

I was reading this review of a new book about Margaret Fuller, who is buried at Mt. Auburn. The Fuller family has an entire plot. I recognized the name of R. Buckminster Fuller but did not have a firm grasp on who he was. Nice, simple gravestone, don’t you think? He invented the geodesic dome.

Photo by author.

Photo by author.

However, his great-aunt’s gravestone (which is actually a cenotaph because she died at sea) tells an entire story. No deductive skills needed here!

Photo by author. A detail of the cenotaph.

Photo by author. A detail of the cenotaph.

Photo by author. The entire cenotaph.

Photo by author. The entire cenotaph.

Arthur Buckminster Fuller (R. Buckminster Fuller’s grandfather) also has quite a story:

Photo by author. Detail of Arthur Buckminster Fuller's gravestone at Mt. Auburn Cemetery.

Photo by author. Detail of Arthur Buckminster Fuller’s gravestone at Mt. Auburn Cemetery.

I spent only a couple of hours at Mt. Auburn that day. You could easily spend a day or two there. On that early March day, it was cold and rainy and dreary. But I loved it. I was almost all alone there. Far from the vision that founder Jacob Bigelow had for the cemetery, but I appreciated the solace.

I’ll post more pictures and stories from Mt. Auburn. I’m also going to start a new series of guest posts about cemeteries, so watch for that announcement!

 

“The Next Big Thing”–Sarah Stonich

Tags

, , , , ,

stonich_vacationland

I’m so pleased to host on my blog the questions author Sarah Stonich has answered as part of The Next Big Thing. The Next Big Thing is a web series of author self-interviews on the subject of recent or forthcoming books.

Sarah is my “sister” in publication. Her book, Vacationland, just came out from the University of Minnesota Press (which is also my publisher). Vacationland has garnered fantastic critical reviews. Read more about Sarah here, and check out this lovely StarTribune profile.

Sarah has “tagged” authors Matt Batt (author of the memoir Sugarhouse) and Amy Ferris (Marrying George Clooney and co-editor of Dancing at the Shame Prom).

Now, the questions…

Ten Interview Questions: the Next Big Thing talks to Sarah Stonich

What is the title of your book?

Vacationland

University of Minnesota Press,

(paperback original April 1, 2013)

$16.95
What’s the structure for the book?

Interconnected stories that pivot on the same geographical point: a once-thriving fishing resort where multiple characters thread one chapter to another, and each to the main protagonist, Meg.

What genre does your book fall under?
Novel-in-stories though I don’t like categorizing fiction in this way. Originally, the publisher printed ‘novel’ on the cover, but I wanted readers to decide for themselves what it was, so it says nothing.

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?
Vera Farmiga, Michael Sheen, Judy Dench, Doug Bedard, and Max von Sydow (not asking much, am I?)

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?
Painter Meg returns to what’s left of the family resort, where visitors and their memories still crowd the place, recalling their various vacations and connections to those who’ve tended the resort since 1939.

How will you help promote this title?
Social media, pursuing library events and alternative venues beyond what my publicist can do (she has more books to promote than mine) Holding my north-woods-themed book launch in a bar was one – I gathered local writers who all helped by reading parts of the book. We had a polka duo, book-jacket beer coasters and a Bad Plaid fashion show. So fun.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?
I can’t really bookend something as nebulous as a start-to-finish date, pun intended. Besides, since time isn’t an element of the creation of a story, it’s really hard to pin down. I’ve published books only to find I’m not completely finished. Vacationland has stories conceived of fifteen years ago. And right now I’m thinking about stories I might not finish for ten years. If pressed, I’d say collective time spent writing Vacationland all squashed together might add up to two or three years.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
Olive Kitteradge, or Visit from the Goon Squad, or Fame, by Daniel Kehlmann

Who or what inspired you to write this book?
The idea of a resort from varying perspectives of visitors, proprietors and locals seemed like a concept I felt worth weaving characters around. In Minnesota, a lot gets written about the wilderness experience, but less about resort life, and very little about the people and the communities that line the roads leading to such places – like the beer truck drivers and bait shop owners. I wanted to tell their stories.  But I was also moved to challenge the tired Minnesota stereotype – not all the men in Vacationland are good looking and not all the children are above average – or white for that matter.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
The theme of vacation. Seems everybody has hard-wired memories of a resort; old cabin; a scout camp, or maybe had some fishing or canoe trip go right or wrong. Vacations can be awful or wonderful or even life-changing. For some, the two weeks in July might be just a yawn in time, a pause in life when there’s enough leisure to take a real look around, or even inward.  How often do vacations turn out as planned, or ‘expected’? Few, I imagine.

 

“The Next Big Thing”–a report

Tags

, , , , , , ,

Thanks to Barrie Jean Borich for tagging me in The Next Big Thing, a web series of author self-interviews on the subject of recent or forthcoming books. Barrie was my mentor when I was part of the Loft Mentorship Series in 2007-08. She saw portions of my book while they were in their early stages. She’s a respected teacher of creative nonfiction and works at De Paul University. Her newest book, Body Geographic, was recently published by the University of Nebraska Press.

Once tagged, we are to respond to a set of questions and post on our blogs, then we tag forward. I am tagging Sarah Stonich, an accomplished writer who recently released a critically acclaimed short story collection Vacationland (University of Minnesota Press, which makes her my “sister” in publication), and Tom Maltman, who is cementing his reputation as a sharp novelist with the recent release of his second book, Little Wolves (Soho Press).

You can look for their interviews in about a week.

What is your working title of your book?

Photo by author.

Photo by author.

My book is titled We’ll Be the Last Ones to Let You Down: Memoir of a Gravedigger’s Daughter. Get it? I took the main title from my dad, who used it as the motto for his gravedigging business. He in turn took it from “The Life of Riley” radio and TV show, which featured an undertaker who was always spouting off puns and witticisms.

Where did the idea come from for the book?

When I left my hometown and went to college, I would tell people what my father did for a living and that always got a reaction. I started to think, “Maybe this WAS an usual way to grow up.”

What genre does your book fall under?

My book is a memoir.

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

Dakota Fanning

Dakota Fanning

Dakota Fanning used to be the go-to actor for little girl roles, but I’m not sure who is now the go-to child actor. Fanning could probably play the teenage me, I suppose.

Meryl Streep

Meryl Streep

My mom wants to be played by Meryl Streep, even though for most of my book my mom is in her 30s and early 40s. But Mom says Meryl Streep is a good enough actor to pull off most any age.

John C. Reilly. Who doesn't love this guy?

John C. Reilly. Who doesn’t love this guy?

I think John C. Reilly would be perfect for the role of a gravedigger.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

Little girl learns about life and death through the stories that spoke to her from the cemetery.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

I approached the University of Minnesota Press directly, and they accepted my manuscript.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

First story to first draft took five years. First draft to final draft took another seven years.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

At the risk of sounding totally arrogant…

Thomas Lynch’s two essay collections, Bodies in Motion and At Rest and The Undertaking. Lynch is a mortician/poet in Michigan and I have not yet read a better perspective on what it’s like to work with death day in and day out.

Alison Bechdel’s Fun Home. I bought Alison’s book right away because I learned her father was a part-time mortician. That is only a small slice of the book, but I was completely captivated by the way she told a story and her display of humble intelligence. In my estimation, this is a perfectly constructed memoir.

Nicole Helget’s The Summer of Ordinary Ways. Helget lyrically captures the essence of small-town Minnesota, with the darkness that exists just below the surface of what seem like ordinary lives.

Who or what inspired you to write this book?

I was a journalist for many years, trained to discern what would make a good story for readers. I had an inkling that my story was unique and would touch people on a universal level. I thought I had something that people would be interested in reading, and that inspired me to keep working on it all these years.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

We all are familiar with death on some level. I hope the stories of loss, life, faith and hope that are in the book will resonate with readers.

Images and tweets from the Minnesota Book Awards

Tags

, , , , , ,

I had the pleasure of attending the Minnesota Book Awards on Saturday night at the Minneapolis Hilton. I went to support three (yes, three!) Mankato authors who were finalists. That’s Mankato representation in three of the eight categories! Mankato is an amazing place to live and write.

Click below to visit my Storify account of the evening, including several images.

[View the story "Minnesota Book Awards, April 13" on Storify]

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 849 other followers